A crooked stock broker was in court for cheating thousands of people out of their hard earned money with an elaborate investment fraud scheme. The District Attorney asked him how many people he had cheated, and the defendant, even with all the proof against him, replied, "None."

Surprised at the answer, the DA said, "Do you know what the penalty is for perjury sir?"

"I do as a matter of fact, and it's a lot less than the ones I'm currently facing," said the broker with a grin.